Darn it! Am I really that much of a bummer?

I just went back and looked through my blogs (I didn't realize there were so many) and noticed that most of them were grim and dark. I guess this is where I was going when I was feeling bummed out. I think I need to post the poem I wrote in college that got me labeled 'the girl who wrote the sex poem' in my sophomore year. That oughta cheer everyone up.

It's actually been a good weekend. I'm thankful for so many things. I'm thankful for friends that don't mind spending time with my husband and me even if there are a couple of tense moments. I'm thankful for any bit of positive communication that I have with my husband right now. I'm thankful for quiet, snuggly, close moments. We haven't had many of those lately and we had a really nice one with weekend. I'm thankful for the hope that I have. Please Lord and Lady, let it grow.

I'm thankful for sex toys. I'm also thankful for ten year olds that are jaded enough to walk in, realize what is going on, walk back out and take their little brother downstairs to watch a movie. I'm thankful that, even though it's taken a huge earthquake in my life, I'm starting to find some balance and getting to the point where I can make more time for the things I really want to do and not the things that I think I should be doing. I'm thankful for my parents, even if they drive me nuts. I'm thankful for all my friends and how supportive they've been lately and for the fact that not a single one of them did anything that made me feel silly for opening up to them, something that I don't do well. I'm thankful for my seven year old and how sweet he is, especially when he tries really hard to heal all of my pain and suffering with his love. I'm thankful for my ten year old who really challenges me to be a better person.

There are a lot of other things I am thankful for. At dinner sometimes, instead of saying a blessing, we go around the table and say something that we are thankful for. I guess today, I'm just overflowing with thankfulness.